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Tuesday, March 4, 2014

Eat some chocolate today.

Three months after Penelope was born I decided it was time to lose the weight I put on during my pregnancy.  I told Stephen.  I told some friends.  Because before I can actually execute any plan of action, I must verbalize it one hundred times.  In the past, my means of losing weight was keeping a food diary, counting my Weight Watcher points, and dancing in front of our Wii.  I've always been able to get back down to the weight I was on my wedding day.  While that is still bigger than I "should" be, it's where I feel comfortable.

But before I took action, I took Penelope to a well child check up.  They give you a piece of paper telling you what to expect each month.  The what to expect in the fourth month paper said, if your nursing, don't cut your calories in order to keep your milk supply strong.  My milk supply diminished greatly around the four and five month mark with both Schroeder and Maggie Lu.  Looking back, that was always when I began my calorie counting.

I wanted to enjoy and relish this last, first year.  I didn't want my diet to dictate when Penelope was weaned so I took that paper's advice.  I feel really proud of that choice.  I see new moms putting loads of effort into finding their old bodies and I feel a sense of freedom to just be gentle and patient with mine.

Nursing and some walking have helped me fit into all my old clothes, but I still have some weight to lose.  Penelope has begun the slow, many months long process of weaning.  She is nine months now and will probably be completely weaned by 12 or 13 months.  I've decided to exploit the season of Lent and instead of counting calories, deny myself desserts.  If I wouldn't eat it as breakfast, lunch, or dinner, I can't have it.  Yogurt is okay.  Chocolate chip cookies are not.

Lent is supposed to start as a spiritual journey of preparing your heart to celebrate Jesus' death and resurrection.  In the spiritual journey, you deny yourself everyday indulgences.  I admit that I'm using the season of Lent because it is a predefined period of time that happens to coincide with the last couple of months of nursing.  I'm doing this for my health and weight, but in an attempt to make it sort of spiritual, I plan to read the four gospels once, twice, or several times before April 20th.

Happy Fat Tuesday all.    

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